Reframing #1

The first class in this course was held on Thursday, July 19, 2007. I took this class as I drove across country and was unable to take notes as the class was in session. I actually think that in some ways I was better able to engage in the class when all I had was my ears. Not that I don’t get a lot out of the classes when I am sitting in my living room with my computer at my finger tips, but I was solely relying on listening.

As soon as we began to dive into the topic of reframing someone in the class asked for a clearer definition of what reframing is. Rather than just give us a word by word ‘definition’ Joanne engaged us in an exercise that we were then able to dialog about which gave us example of what reframing is about. The exercise was to think about something that was frustrating us at the moment and to then shift our perspective or reframe our thinking about that situation. There was a lot of really great sharing about what different students experienced with that for themselves as well as experiences that they have seen their clients have with this. It really is such a basic ‘common sense’ concept but so often difficult to do when one is caught up in the struggle and emotional about it.

Our homework for this week was a piggy back off of this exercise. We were to again think about this frustration that we were having, define what our perspective is about it, reframe our perspective and then take an action toward that reframe and be ready to share it next week. For me it was easy to come up with a frustration because we are in the process of moving across country and there are a lot of added stressors that come with a big move. I have been frustrated with feeling “gouged” or ‘taken’ by everyone…like we can’t ever get a break and be the one that comes our ahead. From the buyers, to the realtor, the movers and the insurance company…they all dig their claws in and take all they can get. My perspective is that we never get to be the one to come our ahead, we always get the raw end of the deal. My reframe is that I get to have a great adventure and that in the long run we are the ones getting the best bargain by this move as a whole. My action step toward this reframe is to be focused on the end result and how fortunate we are to be able to make this extraordinary move that will ultimate be for the betterment of our family.